To the only one who really knew:

If you called, I'd pick up. I guess that's why you haven't.

I'm really sorry, for what I've done. I wasn't trying to make you feel that way. I don't think anyone can help. If anyone could, it would have been you.

Please don't let it hurt you. I wasn't trying to dismiss you. I just didn't want to continue being like I was.

I'm sorry I've been this way. I'm sorry I don't know what's wrong with me.

I can't stop feeling so alone, even when you're here. Everyone seems so transient. I feel like I'm on a different plane. I feel like I'm just some kind of shadow or that there's something strange that's fallen out of place, like a law of where my consciousness should be confined.

I think it's all caught up to me.

I think I need to see a psychiatrist, but I won't.